I have a feeling that I might be getting older. Several things have alerted me to this alarming possibility. Firstly, I’ve started using sentences that begin with “in my day..”.
I find myself getting antsy to leave whatever social function I’m at the minute it strikes eleven. Also, I’ve started using phrases like “social function” (that can’t be good).
To top it off, last night I discovered that there are certain frequencies only “young people” can hear. I thought my friends had conspired in an elaborate hoax against me, when they all covered their ears to block out the “horrendous high-pitched noise” supposedly emanating from my flatmate’s i-phone. All I could hear was a deafening silence. That’s when it dawned on me: if only young people can hear that sound, and I can’t, then does that mean my youth is over? OVER? Already?
On one hand, that would be a relief, because if I’m being honest I’ve never much fancied staying out ‘til the wee small hours in sub-antarctic conditions (it’s no coincidence that my name is an anagram of “nana”). But on the other hand, did I really make the most of my youth? Did I stay up late enough and expend enough energy doing ‘youthful’ things to have now earned the right to sit at home with a blanket over my knees on a Friday night?
I think not.
Which would certainly be cause for alarm. Except that at my age, nothing can shock me.
(Are you wondering if you're young? You can test your own hearing here. Hope you can't hear it either.)